How to Disagree – With Integrity (Happy Election Day!)

By Nina Fondiller Woldin

I don’t need to remind you that tomorrow is election day! Media – social and otherwise – is filled with people telling me how they feel, and trying to convince me to agree with them. 

Most people agree that everyone these days disagrees, strongly.

Do you have friends or family who can no longer talk to you about anything but their political views? Do you know anyone who chooses their friends based on whether they are Conservative or Liberal, Republican or Democrat?

While the outcome of the election is important, and it’s certainly important to vote, I hope we remember that there is more to a person than their political views, and that these views are most probably nuanced. Not all Liberals or Conservatives believe exactly the same thing about every issue. The cousin who can’t stop telling me how to vote also has daughters who grew up with mine, and grandchildren who play with my grandchildren. I’d like to focus on our deep connections instead.

Chai Mitzvah has three sourcebooks that address this issue – one for adults, one for teens, and one for families. They are part of both the  Jewish Journeys materials and the Grandparents and Beyond materials – filled with texts and activities to help us in these volatile times. Here is one of my favorite texts from the Grandparents and Beyond sourcebook, INDIVIDUAL AND COMMUNITY: How to Disagree – With Integrity:

Just as it is a mitzvah to say something which will be listened to, so too is it a mitzvah to refrain from saying something which will not be listened to.
Babylonian Talmud, Yevamot 65b 

So, please get out there and vote! And also remember that even if we don’t agree on every issue, we can still be friends.